Every morning we check Google News for Facebook-related stories and without fail, always find a news story or two illustrating how vastly more entertaining Facebook is for the rest of the world. Australians, Britons and Spaniards seem to use Facebook only to plan huge flash-mob parties at beaches, pools and vacation homes. Here, we sometimes get Facebook invites to Tech Karaoke. In America, the only crimes Facebook facilitates are child porn and child molestation — depressing, not fun. Abroad, Facebook figures prominently in stories of murder, prostitution, and even clashes against the government. Below nine news stories showing exactly how much more enjoyment foreigners are having getting into trouble with Facebook. Here in the States, we’re sitting at our computers while wondering how Facebook’s going to make money, or something. Clearly, we’re doing it wrong.